I Watch Appallingly Bad Television

I was doing a bit of thinking recently, and I came to a realization. I watch a lot of television; one could in fact argue that I watch way too much. And you know what, most of it is pretty bad.

So here we go, a smattering of the shit that I watch, for better or worse.

Thomas The Tank Engine: Two words: Ringo Starr. You don't like those words? How about George Carlin or Alec Baldwin. This show had some great narrators, and overall was pretty amazing. The link is to a truly classic episode: Thomas and the Breakdown Train. Furthermore, it has the perks of being free on Comcast OnDemand. Amazing.

The Joy of Painting with Bob Ross: Continuing on with shows from my childhood. You might remember him as the guy who's famous for saying, "We don't make mistakes, we make happy accidents." He's just got the voice, the painting abilities, and the thing he does banging out his paintbrush on the easel to dry it off is really just one of the best things that has ever happened to me. The worst thing is that I couldn't find any clips on YouTube--apparently there's this whole 'copyright infringement' nonsense. Whatever.

Mister Rogers' Neighborhood: I really don't know when it's on anymore (similar to the Joy of Painting) but when it's on, you're damn right I watch it. The link I included is Mister Rogers' testimony to the Senate Subcommittee on Communications in 1969, urging Congress to continue funding public television. It's really heartfelt--watch it and you'll feel better about yourself. Just a genuinely nice guy, and very concerned with childhood development, Mr. Rogers was depressingly not a Navy SEAL, though that doesn't make the show any less worth watching.

The Twilight Zone: Say what you will, but this show ended production about 45 years ago and it's still brilliant. I wish I had an imagination like Rod Serling. Adding to its staying power, Twilight Zone had a ton of stars, either at the end or beginning of their careers, making for some very enticing television. I've linked to one of my favorite episodes, "To Serve Man". Just watch it.

Basically Anything on BBC America: Except, for some reason, Cash in the Attic--I just can't get into it. My favorites are Ramsey's Kitchen Nightmares (The UK one, not the US one), Skins (holy shit amazing), Top Gear, and Doctor Who (don't judge); as well as How Clean is your House and You Are What You Eat. As it turns out, most of these programs are made by Channel 4, but whatever. The channel's brilliant: watch it, love it.

Educational Shows: I love The Universe on the History Channel, and basically anything on the Science Channel, National Geographic, Discovery Channel and any other learning type channel. Except TLC. I do not care for that family of like 19, for example, or the redecorating show. But seriously, if it's got Neil deGrasse Tyson or Michio Kaku (yes that is his MySpace page) I love it.

So that's a little overwhelming. Sorry for getting a little link-happy towards the end, but I just want you to know I did my research for you. I also neglected to include some of the more normal stuff I watch--SportsCenter, the news, My Super Sweet Sixteen (for more on that, see this post on the subject), because its boring, and you don't want to read about it.

And that's that. Happy 2009.