A Random Thought

If you make a mistake typing a text message in T9 or iTap or whatever you want to call it on cell phones, is it still a typo? Because chances are you'll just get a completely different word.

Furthermore, if you mean type in the numbers 6 and 3 to get "of", but the phone decides it wants to go with "me" and you don't pick up on it, is that still a typo. I mean it's a completely different word.

These are questions I must have the answers to.

Will It Blend? - Guitar Hero III

YouTube really does have some ridiculous stuff on it. Get past the Family Guy clips, the plethora of music videos, and Bro Rape, and you are still left with a phenomenal amount of really bizarre shit. Take, for example, Will It Blend?

This guy just takes random objects and blends the living hell out of them. Now don't get me wrong, this is cool as hell, but does he actually work for a blending company? I imagine he must as he destroys some rather expensive items. So let's assume he does work for a company. I think this company needs to hire a publicity company because they need more press. For example, the host pulverizes the daylights out of an iPhone. Do I need a blender that can cause this much destruction? Of course not, but I want one, because you never know when you need to grind up your most recent term paper you failed...or that cinder block thats been sitting on your fire escape since you moved in.

So in conclusion, keep on destroying cool shit, Will It Blend Host. I'll be rooting for you.

High Quality Doctors

One of the conditions of my leaving the hospital was that I had to have a primary care physician in Connecticut lined up to manage my care. Well, as it turns out, the last doctor I had here was my pediatrician. So we make the appropriate appointments, and out I go. Well not quite, but bear with me here.

I had my first (and subsequently my last) appointment with my pediatrician--who shall remain nameless--on Friday. Apparently it took me a couple of days to write about it. Regardless, My mom and I go in for a quick checkup of my leg (which has two gigantic incisions in it) to make sure it was healing properly. Just to get you, fair reader, up to speed, on my inner-left leg, I have about 10 inches of "linear" a.k.a. normal stitches that honestly looks like something out of Pirates of the Caribbean. The surgeons couldn't close the other side so they had to use a skin graft, which makes the wound look like an eye. Delicious. The only things protecting my wounds from the outside air are some Vaseline gauze, some non-stick pads and an ace bandage.

Anyway, my mom and I begin unwrapping the ace and taking the wrappings off, and Dr. Weak Stomach just begins backing away. He looks at my leg (from across the room) and made the determination that everything looked all right from a medical standpoint. He then added--and this is what kills me--"but man does that [my skin graft] look gross." I mean, don't get me wrong, it does indeed look gross, but that is definitely not what you want to hear from a medical professional regarding your body. I'm sure our faithful doctor made a similar comment the last time he saw a wound like that--in his textbook in med school.

I mean look, the man is a good pediatrician, but he just wasn't set up for this. At this point, I attempted to end the appointment as quickly as possible and get the hell out of there. I quickly discard all the information that Dr. Bedside Manner had annunciated to me and made a mental note to never go back there again.

Since then, and say what you will, I've decided to keep my care within the Ivy League community. Elitist? Yes? But I didn't spend 24 days in the hospital to have some joker with a degree from the back of a cereal box fuck it up in the last quarter mile. Is that even an expression? I doubt it.

So now that I've officially decided I'm rambling, I bid you, dear reader, adieu.

Why I Love the BBC

So I'm watching a special about Princes Charles and Williams and how they are "Royal Rivals". The narrator discussed how Charles and Diana took their children on lots of exotic vacations.

The narrator begins "Charles and Diana took their kids on lots of exotic vacations," then a pause as the visuals show the kids racing around a very green area on quads. When one discusses the British Royal Family and exotic vacations, one thinks of areas like Myanmar (or as the British still lovingly refer to it, Burma), or Fiji, or Timbuktu. Not so much I quickly found out, as the narrator continued, "such as Goldie Hawn's Colorado ranch."

Ah yes, Colorado...exotic. I mean not to knock the great state of Colorado, but it seems as exotic to me as a trip to the supermarket. So go ahead BBC, keep thinking that Colorado is exotic, and I'll keep trying to figure out why the British Pound is doing so well.

Out of the hospital

So one of the many reasons I've not posted in a while is that I just spent the last three and a half weeks in the hospital. The good news is that now I'm out and after the insane monotony of that place, I'm going to need to get some creative writing flowing in order to not lose my mind.

On that note, more to come.

Explosions In The Sky

It's probably not what you're thinking. They're a band I've been listening to a lot recently, and I thought I should share my enjoyment with the world. They also contributed the majority of the soundtrack of Friday Night Lights. They're also from Texas.

Wikipedia describes Explosions as 'post-rock'. I'm entirely sure what that means, but I'm going to go ahead and call them an instrumental band that immediately evokes an emotional response. You will know instantly if you love or hate them, and, quite frankly, I love them.

Their songs, especially the ones found on Friday Night Lights Soundtrack are so damn uplifting it hurts. I also have to strongly recommend their album, "The Earth Is Not A Cold Dead Place". It just makes me feel so empowered. Like I can go out and succeed at whatever I should so desire. Strong instrumentals, especially the base guitar and drums (note: this might be the entire band, though there are definitely symbols) really just make the album come alive.

So go out, listen to some of their songs. I don't think you will be dissappointed.

The Peak of White People Dancing

I'm watching The Cat's Meow right now, and I've come to a very important realization. The Charleston (seen below) was the peak of white person dancing.

This influential style of dancing was made popular in the 1920's, and was considered by some to be the height of decadence. It mainly consists of awkwardly flailing one's arms and possibly one's legs in a bizarre manner. There has been nothing so easy for those of the Caucasian persuasion as this dance. No wonder they say white people can't dance. It's not that we can't dance, its that the styles of the times have progressed beyond the maximum skill of white people.

In conclusion: The times may change, but white people dancing still sucks.

Two Quick Product Reviews

The 52(ish) inch Rear Projection TV in our condo in Myrtle Beach

Awesome. Kinda sucks during the day because the glare makes the image really hard to see. Though I should be at the beach anyway.

Amber Bock (a product of Michelob)

The first sip of this beer said this, "I need to invest in some of this!" Halfway through the beer I realized that the beer a. needs to stay cold longer and b. it totally gets worse as you drink more. By the time the last sip came around, it was decidedly pretty bad. But like any true gentleman should, I finished it.

Next week's reviews: an ethernet cable and steering wheels.